Who is leading the polls to replace Jim DeMint?: Why, Stephen, of couse
Poinsettas: Festive and deadly
Who had their eyelids surgically removed (probably)?: Michele Bachman
Needs to Happen: Breaking Abbey (Breaking Bad as performed by the cast of Downton Abbey)
Farewell: Ham Rove
Christmas Songs: Baby, It’s Cold Outside, Good King Wenceslas, Have Your Yourself a Merry Little Christmas, Happy Christmas (War is Over)
Where did the SuperPAC Money Go?: To help with campaign finance reform!!!
Who’s ON NOTICE: Nikki Haley, for waiting until after Stephen went on hiatus to announce that she had selected someone else for the Senate seat!!! Who the hell is Tim Scott, anyway?!!